To Get What You Wanted
Feb 27, 2024
HomeSunk deep in his mattress, Connor watched as his email inbox refreshed, over and over. It was late March, and the acceptance letter his grade twelve mind had fought so hard for was a minute overdue.
Stepping onto Ring Road for the first time was a rush. He never thought he’d get here. All the opportunities before him, the smart people, the world-class education, the jobs, it was nearly too much. The clubs, the campus resources, the student-led organizations; his eyes widened at the prospect of it all.
An ideal boy, in an ideal world.
In no time, his Notion to-do list was integrated with his Google Calendar and Obsidian in-class notes, and his typing speed was in the three digits.
It was true that Connor’s friends would — from time to time — ask him how he was always on top of his assignments. It was a simple answer: “being organized,” he would tell them.
With all his extra time, Connor did what he had been dreaming of all through those lonely highschool years. He frequented the go, archery, poker, hiphop, and mathNEWS clubs. He stayed up late having life chats with new friends, and he woke up early to hit the gym five days a week. Being ahead on school, he had the space to study early for his midterms, and the interview prep was never put off too long.
San Francisco was a bustling city. Connor could finally add outdoor runs to his lunchtime routine, finishing at Buena Vista to eat with the team most days. He always smiled when he ran; he couldn’t think of a reason to frown when he was making a fortune at the fintech startup he had the fortune to be hired by.
Well, not exactly fortune. He was more focused, productive, and effective than his buddies back home; it wasn’t luck that brought him here. And with any luck, his determination would bring him so much farther.
His upper-year friends kept telling him 3B was the hardest term of his degree, but so far it really wasn’t so bad.
With a startup and two part-time jobs on top of his five courses, Connor felt more rejuvenated than ever. Everything he chose to do was finally his conscious choice; he had swam upstream for long enough. With all the disposable income from the work, he had gotten himself an Audi R8. Now he wasn’t limited by the uncomfortably slow transit, either.
These days, his friends would plan nights out and sometimes he couldn’t make it. He never said no to anything, it was just that his schedule was filled up weeks in advance. If the bros really wanted him around, they’d have to start being an appreciable fraction as organized as he was.
Connor loved the freedom of never saying no again. All he had to say was “sorry, I’ve got a meeting with a client on the west coast that night.”
With only three business electives on his plate, he could work full-time at Citadel while coasting through the last months of his degree.
His friends knew he was going places. They were sure of it; nearly as sure as he was. No one gets here by chance. You get here through the single-minded drive to accomplish what you always knew you could. Every big step you take, you get a moment to bask in the perfect joy of your doubts slipping away, before you remember you knew you could do it all along. With it all going as planned and any setbacks really just being opportunities, you’re gripped by the possibility that lies before you.
An ideal boy, in an ideal world.
At night, when he couldn’t sleep, he thought of the young, passionate boy who knew what he wanted. Those rosy eyes, and the determination underneath that brought him here.
And he would wonder if that boy ever really did win his fight.